Promises, Promises.
In recent years this word has copped a bit of a bashing particularly in political circles here in Australia. We’ve gotten down to “Is that a ‘core’ promise or is it just a promise”?
I guess in a way the kind of promises that can impact your life in such a big way as to stand between you and what you desire could be called ‘core promises’.
You know the kind I mean right?
I promise to always be a good little girl. I can remember making that promise. Looking back on my life now, I can see how it caused me to let people do things to me that I didn’t like, because ‘good little girls’ didn’t make a fuss. I can see how that promise caused me to try too hard to please people that mattered to me and caused me so much pain because no matter how ‘good’ I was, I never felt appreciated for it.
The ‘good little girl’ promise also carried some guilt into my life too. Good little girls didn’t smoke…oops. Good little girls didn’t sometimes drink too much, or get really angry or do things that might make them feel a little ashamed. Oooops
The good little girl promise has been a rich playground for my personal growth and understanding over the years. It has given me a lovely pathway to follow to uncover those hidden parts of myself that fall under the heading ‘good little girl’.
Do you have a ‘core’ promise that can give that same gift to you. I discovered it through my writing. When I started I had no idea how to journal but over the years I’ve developed my style. Recently I’ve decided to be a bit more creative with it. Words are fine but scribbles and doodles can offer me a lot of insight too. And what happens if I use a coloured pen? Does my choice of colour give me another avenue to explore how that ‘core’ promise might be playing out deep within me? Probably.
Don’t be afraid to look deeply at those promises that hide within you. As you can see, sometimes they bring pain and discomfort and other times, their gifts can offer you an interesting journey as you discover they can also bring you right back home to who you really are.
15, August 2008 at 2:10 am
What you are calling core promises do have a tendency to hold us to things that may cause pain. The promises themselves aren’t the culprit. It is the beliefs behind the promises that are hurting us.
By looking at the promises we dig out the beliefs and bring them to light for analytical examination. Once examined and found harmful to you as an individual then we can more easily allow those beliefs to fall away and replace them with more beneficial beliefs.
Very good article Cate.
15, August 2008 at 6:19 am
I can see how this promise to try live to identity and ideal of being a good little girl can be limiting and depending on what that personally means. I guess that is what the journaling has done over years for you. Create the contemplative moments challenging
why you made that promise and if it serves you well in some ways or not.
I guess this is the thing, if we make a promise to be seen a certain way and have an identity, whatever that means to us personally is the domain we restrict to us until we may realise we need to grow more and it no longer may serve us.
As spiritual beings having a humnan experience the soul cries out for more expression than identites we try to take on for whatever reasons to start with.
The ego mind likes an idenitity to keep us the same and survive in the familar roles but it conflicts with deeper parts of our being which always wants to grow and experience more.
I’ve actually always tried to avoid any identities I sense could pigeon hole me which is interesting as I write this I realise maybe that is like a promise I made to myself.